Red Room Where the Writers Are

Gentle Readers, we've been hearing much about the elusive Joe Six Pack these days. Sarah Palin has brought him up many times in her speeches and her debate last Thursday. Yet, who is this Joe Six Pack? What do we know about him?
I was honored to find Mr. Six Pack and sat him down for an interview.

Me: Thank you for sitting down, Mr. Six Pack.

Joe Six Pack: Thank you, ma'am, for wanting to talk to me. You can call me Joe.

Me: All right Joe, how do you feel about Governor Palin mentioning you lately?

Joe: Well, I don't know what to think. I feel that she is pandering to the Reagan Democrats in saying 'Hey, I am one of you.' when she's not. She says she fired the chef in the governor's mansion when she didn't.  She said she sold the govenor's plane on Ebay when she didn't. It says so on her profile she didn't sell it.

Me: So you feel like she contradicts herself?

Joe: Yes ma'am. You shouldn't lie about something like your Ebay account when you can find it so easy online. Plus I don't think it's right she is bragging about firing a cook and staff from a mansion. Those people need to work. Jobs are hard to come by these days.

Me: Did anything else bother you about the debate?

Joe: Well, I didn't like it she was rude to Miss Ifill. She was just doing her job and she was being professional about it.  Saying 'I'm not answering it the way the moderator wants me to answer it' was just rude.

Me: If you could sit down with Sarah Palin, what would you say to her?

Joe: I would ask her why she made those ladies pay for those rape kits.

Me: Excuse me?

Joe: Well I read that when she mayor of that Wasilla, she made women who were raped pay for their rape kits. A family member of mine was raped years ago and she couldn't afford to pay for one of those kits. Thank God she didn't have to, but I just don't understand why a lady would do that to another lady. Ma'am, may I introduce you to someone?

Me: Sure!

Joe: This is my wife, Jane Six Pack.

Me: Mrs. Six Pack! Hello!

Jane: Just call me Jane, Ms. Gibbons.

Me: Okay Jane, what do you think of the governor...

Jane: Let me tell you something! What does she think she's trying to do, dropping her g's? It's so tacky. I teach second grade and I'm trying to instill in them good grammar.

Me: You have a point....

Jane: And why aren't her children in school? Can't the grandparents take care of them while they are in school?

Joe: Jane, let Ms. Gibbons talk.

Me: It's okay. Go ahead, Jane. 

Jane: She talks about Joe Six Pack and Hockey Moms.  Like she knows about what we go through every day. Well let me tell the governor something: Her hokey speaking style doesn't make me want to vote for her. It makes me want to see Fargo again. She has no idea what it's like to be a teacher and pay out of your pocket for supplies. I'm tired of people like her who thinks all she has to do is wink and she can get votes. And I'm done.

Joe: She gets upset about politics.

Me: I can tell.

Joe: I'm about done myself. All I know is I just don't feel like the lady is genuine. She reminds of those people who come visit schools and they pretend to be interested in a kid's art work but aren't interested. Does that make sense, Ms. Gibbons?

Me: It does, Joe. It makes a lot of sense.