Humor
November 5, 2009
- I am in Montreal for the annual meeting of the American Academy of Religion on behalf of my company, HarperOne (represent!). Montreal is a beautiful city, but the people in Canada are delusional, stubbornly holding onto the old myth that this is an independent nation. The people in Montreal go even further—many of them insist on speaking French, a language that was outlawed under provisions of ...
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November 5, 2009
- Deep into the armpit of this unusual and physically demanding semester, a former student wrote to ask if I could submit letters of recommendation to what looks to be about ten or so colleges and universities. If you haven't applied recently to a college or university, you will find that there are often online sites to do so and if there are not, there are additional forms to fill out and send ...
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November 4, 2009
- The puppy is a sorbet. “What breed’s that?” you ask. “Anything like a bichon? I thought she was a Doberman.” Well, yes, that she certainly is. What I mean to say is that I write about the puppy as a personal sorbet, a palate cleanser between dealing with the ‘big stuff.’ War, disease, death, destruction, the government, personal angst, global warming. To ...
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November 3, 2009
- The puppy is a glutton for candy corn. I mistakenly toss her a couple kernels from the seventy-five-percent-off Halloween sale bag and it’s an instant addiction. Quick, dial the support group! She craves More! More! More! The normal doggie repertoire of tricks --- sit, lie down, roll over, give paw --- has always been terribly beneath her, but now she lurches into a ...
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November 2, 2009
- Halloween is a national holiday here in San Francisco. This isn’t simply because people get to dress in sexy costumes borrowed from their wives’ closets or purchased at one of our local leather emporiums. Yes, it is a time when people get to come out of their shell and walk around the streets of a major city expressing their inner slut, but there is more to it than that. It’s really about ...
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November 1, 2009
- Got confused by the recent political Town Hall Tea Parties. For one thing, no one served tea. But a lot of yelling about health and insurance. Well, then, they should have serrved tea, a great source of antioxidants, especially if you drink green tea. The Cleveland Tea Party, of course, was a great symbol of American spirit, when we tossed, at the behest of the coffee lobby, all that damn ...
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October 31, 2009
- Over the weeks, I've had guest calling parked at the side of the road, guest calling from up in the mountains or on a trail through the wilds. I've had guests from Canada and England, however today my show with Courtney J Webb was something different. Courtney is in Australia, and with the aid of a bottle of Prune Juice (that could cause some issues later on) joined the show at 2am in the ...
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October 30, 2009
- It has been a very, very long time (four months) since I wrote about the assault of the pigeons on the West coast of this great land, and in particular on the light well outside my kitchen, and no doubt many of you have wondered about the status of this epic battle for the soul of America. My sense is you have all been holding your breath, terrified that these pernicious monsters were winning and ...
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October 29, 2009
- The third time I showed up to grade school in the same costume, my friends started to wonder if my mother was nurturing a secret fascination with witches. As I once again stood awkwardly before my second grade classmates in my dyed bed sheet turned dress, raggedy wig, and black hat that had miraculously survived a run-in with the neighbor’s cat the year before, they shook their heads. My ...
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October 28, 2009
