From Virtual to Flesh and Blood
I value my Redroom online friendships. I see no reason why “virtual” should be considered any less substantial than face-to-face meetings. It seems you get to the core of the matter without a lot of preening. When ideas, thoughts, interests meet in the ether, you are reaching out with the most cherished aspect of your being: your mind and spirit. In the ether, you judge less by appearances and heavily by content.
Belle and Judith Tannenbaum today at Carmel River State Beach
I’ve been reading and emailing Judith Tannenbaum for many months, and I had the privilege of meeting her today when she came into town to see her 89 year-old mother, Edith. I had told her in an email that when we do finally take our walk together, it would be the meeting of the tree people like in The Lord of the Rings. She, a fir tree (tannenbaum) and I, a poplar (yang).
As I rang her mother’s doorbell, my heart was beating fast in anticipation of unwrapping a gift that I felt I worked to deserve. And I was not disappointed. Judith has a sparkle in her eyes of which her author photo captures only a fraction. She was full of questions and learned more about me than I, her. I imagine there will be another walk when I’ll ask the questions that are now crowding my mind.
We took a long. brisk stroll by the water and I showed her my elementary school, the kids’ garden with its tadpole pond, blooming cana, and my fifth grade classroom where Mr. Smith taught us to do swan dives from the mini trampoline, never failing to catch us in his arms. This summer day could have hardly been more conducive to a jaunt with a new/old friend.
Please click here to visit Judith in Redroom.com and here for her own website.
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sonshi (not verified) says:
Outstanding
What a touching tribute to your "new" friend. :-))
My wife finally met her longtime penpal in Ohio two weeks ago, and she described similar thoughts. It not only made their relationship tighter but more meaningful; my wife sent out two large gift packages to her a couple of days ago.
Belle Yang says:
One day
we will also meet, Thomas!
sonshi (not verified) says:
I think so too
How far away are you from Silicon Valley? Drive time, that is.
Belle Yang says:
An hour and-a-half south
from Cupertino. The one other RR friend I've met is William Poy Lee. We had tea in town.
sonshi (not verified) says:
Just 1.5 hours
I'd traveled that far to get flaming shoes, remember? Also I'll be sure to rent a Hummer to drive down -- you and my wife might go (hat) shopping. :-)
Ericka Lutz says:
What a beautiful picture of
What a beautiful picture of you two! I'm envious of you both.
Belle Yang says:
I have no doubt
we'll meet, too. I like prolonging the online courtship ;) I am a friendly hermit. I really don't see many people nor have a desire to have a lot of friends. Too many friends and you have no real friends.
June Casagrande says:
Belle!
This is really nice. You've sort of opened my eyes to some possibilities I didn't really see before. Helped me see a connection between this computer-screen world and the real world.
So thank you, and I'm glad to hear the meeting was such a pleasure for you!
Belle Yang says:
I'm glad this post
was able to help make the connection for you. I've trusted the meeting of minds through letters, and now email.
I don't trust my eyes. My eyes deceive me all the time.
Someone said I was a blogger, which took me aback. I don't consider myself a blogger at all. Just communicating.
Darlene Arden says:
Glorious!
That photo is glorious! Thank you for taking us with you on your wonderful day. How perfect to finally meet and in such an idyllic setting. I'm so glad you two were able to finally meet in person.
Kristy Kiernan says:
How lovely :-) It looks like
How lovely :-) It looks like you had a great time together. I've met many of my "online" friends and never been disappointed. Hope you meet many more and enjoy them as well.
Belle Yang says:
I hope you are real
After the fake author, I'm feeling wobbly.
Kristy Kiernan says:
How lovely :-) It looks like
How lovely :-) It looks like you had a great time together. I've met many of my "online" friends and never been disappointed. Hope you meet many more and enjoy them as well.
Cheryl L Snell says:
What a nice photo!
I'm glad you two had fun. I've met several online friends in the flesh, too, and it's always been rewarding.
Cheryl Snell www.shivasarms.blogspot.com
Belle Yang says:
Sheeh
I'm real. Are you real, Cheryl? I think you are real.
Darlene, I'm pretty sure you are real.
One one bad egg can sure stir up some insecurities in me.
Judith Tannenbaum says:
thanks
Was such a gift to meet you, Belle, walk and talk together, and see your elementary school which looks like the kind of school I wish all kids could go to. And then -- to add to the gift -- you asked that kind couple to take our picture, and you posted it here along with such a nice account of our meeting.
I know: I ask lots of questions. Feel free to ask me whatever you want.
More thanks -- Judith
Belle Yang says:
I have proof
Judith is real.
Evie Shockley says:
connections -- virtual, physical, and in between
That is a fabulous photo!
I agree with you, Belle -- there's no reason why we should consider online friendships any less "real" than those with people we've met in person. People can be forthcoming and chemistry can spark (platonic or otherwise!) in email messages and blog comments -- and people in "real life" can be distant and impenetrable. It's all about what a person brings to the potential connection.
Besides, I'm finding today an "in-between" space in all of this! You're an online friend whom I've not (yet) met in person, Belle, but right now I am holding in my hands a beautiful, color-filled book called Always Come Home to Me, and because you wrote it, I feel your presence in my life in a very tangible way. : ) I am going to give this book to my twin nieces tomorrow. (They're too young for it, but the 'rents will hold on to it for them until they're ready!) Thus, in a sense, you will also be known to others in my family and be a part of my nieces' childhood. This makes me very happy! And I might not have stumbled upon this lovely book about these twins and their family (including the doves), had we not begun this online friendship!
So I'm going to sleep on the image of you and Judith, walking on the beach, speaking long and slow words in the language of trees . . .
Ana Elsner says:
Just wondering
I read, and now I see visual documentation, of all this girl-on-girl love (pardon the pun!) running rampant amongst redroom authors...
Makes me wonder how many romantic liaisons, if any, (hetero or otherwise) will spring from this shared site, you know, a la match.com...
? redmatch.com ?
? matchroom.com ?
? redmatchroom.com ?
? shroom.com ?
;)
Belle Yang says:
Oh, Ana
You are a sweet, adorable curmudgeon. Let me give you a big hug.
Thomas Dotson says:
Romantic Liasions
I only want to know if anyone gets married after meeting on the site. Now that would be front page news.
Thomas Dotson, redroom.com
Ana Elsner says:
For Whom the Wedding Bells Toll
- 1001 guests - كتاب ألف ليلة وليلة - kitāb 'alf layla wa-layla;
- the attending authors as brilliant and inspired as Scheherazade herself;
- fame and fortune for redroom.com via thousands of clicks-per-page;
- the notorious couple living in endless bliss with an endless stream of paparazzi in tow;
and the whole affair culminating in the filming of a new Bollywood romance based on their glamourous love story.
--- Look for the movie release in New Delhi in the spring of 2010 ( of course, redroom.com gets 10% of the box-office take...).
::
Mary Peitso says:
And the sun even came out
And the sun even came out for you! Oh, how I miss the sun!
Mary
Carolyn Burns Bass says:
Belle of the blog
Like you, I have weblationships all over the world. These friends are as real to me as my next door neighbor. I've been blessed to meet many of these friends in the skin. As much as I like sending and receiving virtual hugs, it's always a thrill to give and receive the real thing.
I love that picture of you in that marvelous hat.
Farzana Versey says:
They are real enough...
Belle:
Since I have only just joined, I am late for posting here. I have met several of my readers, and some may be writers themselves, since they email me after going through columns. It is fascinating because they come to see a dominatrix and find a real nice person (uh-huh) :) Some are disappointed...imagine all their images coming to nothing...