Jewelle Gomez Lesbian/feminist/speculative fiction author & cultural worker

Dispatches from the Wedding Front #5

August 21, 2008, 5:31 pm

rings.jpg

Standing in one of my favorite stores, Just for Fun, (3982 24th Street in Noe Valley), my partner, Diane and I were looking over card stock for our wedding invitation.   I repeat that in my head in lieu of pinching myself which looks a little wierd in public.  Card stock....wedding invitation?!

 We never imagined ourselves in that position.  We were talking w/David who's been busy all summer cranking out classy and quirky wedding invitations for queer couples around the Bay Area.  He's got equal marriage fatigue but still has a great eye and helps us with what works and what doesn't.  (tiny script--out!)

But it's not just the moment of realization that we've made a huge step that smacks me in the face; it's the realization that the majority of queer people in the US still don't have this right and the sadness that the women who raised me died before having the chance to share this with me.  I can't do anything to bring them back for the huge party we're throwing (despite being a  writer of vampyre fiction, I've not yet broken through to that other side) but I can keep doing the work to bring the rights to others.

In the meantime  Dark Garden http://www.darkgarden.com is working on my corset and Diane's vest for the wedding.  No white since 'virgin' hasn't been connected to my name since the last time I attended St Francis de Sales!  Wine colored brocade with large gold flowers.  Lace me up and I can stand up all night!

We're not having new rings made, we've been together long enough to have given each other sufficient jewelry.  However there are two pieces that mean the most to us, I think.  Diane's first gift was a vintage engagement ring when we thought we'd just be engaged forever.  And last year we took my late father's Masonic ring and my late mother's engagement ring (from her second husband, another story) had them melted down and turned into a lovely rose gold ring for Diane.  It's one way to have the ancestors there with us and my mother and father get to be together again at last!

Two days after the wedding ceremony we'll be voting in the November primary.  We'll finally be a legal entity, in this state at least and then I get to vote for a bi-racial man for president of the US. 

One could almost believe I live in a fully functioning democracy.