The news this morning was not good.  (is it ever?) "Detectives searching for 7-year-old Somer Thompson say they believe they have found her body. "  How often do we turn on the news and hear stories like this?  Too often! 87 sex offenders lived within a five year radius of her. The strongest punishment for sex offenders is one year in prison.  Most sex offenders will sexually molest at least 100 children in their life.  I find these statistics appalling.  I should know

When I was halfway through my five years of recovery I found out that my ex-husband had sexually abused my two older daughters.  I was devasted.  My youngest daughter had been raped at gunpoint when she was 17.  I heard that my ex was dying of cancer and went to his house to confront him.  I don't what I expected from this man who had cheated on me, beat me up and used intimidation tactics to keep me in line. The book, "Winning Through Intimidation" was the bible he kept near him just in case I got out of line.  When I confronted him his comment was, "Yeah, sure, I did but it was their fault not mine." My daughters were four and five at the time.  I heard later that he and a family friend would take turns molesting the girls, passing them back and forth between them.  I should take some consulation from knowing that he died in agony, friendless and alone, alienated from all of his four children but one. But when the searing pictures flood my brain; when I feel the full boot of guilt and remorse, it doesn't help much.

This shows the reality in the statistic that says children of an untreated childhood sexual abuse victim are five times more likely to become molested themselves. My father raped me when I was 13, setting off suicide attempts, three domestic violence marriages, time spend in a psychiatric ward, time spent in a women's shelter, and years of counseling from too many to mention therapists that did no good.  By the time I finally got the help I needed my children were all grown and all three of my daughters (I have one son who spent 15 years on the LAPD; he was voted Officer of the Year in 1998 and now works for the State Deptartment training police in Afghanistan - the irony of this escapes me at times) were in domestic violence marriages.  By the time I finished recovery they had all rid themselves of their perpetrators.  Seeing what mom went through made a difference for today they are all happily married to healthy males (so am I). Think about it.

We need to prepare our children for the world they are about to enter.  Most children who are molested desperately need training in boundary setting.  More often than not the perpetrator is a family member so it does no good to tell them to stay away from strangers. I turn on the television too many times to find that the first news is filled with chilling stories about another yet missing or molested child.  When are we going to start to take this epidemic seriously?

Please see The Lamplighters at www.thelamplighters.org for help.